Thursday's Child ... has far to go ... (0nm10wn2feet) wrote,
Thursday's Child ... has far to go ...
0nm10wn2feet

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Aphorisms for April Fool's Day

"Here cometh April again, and as far as I can see the world hath more fools in it than ever."
- Charles Lamb, 1775-1834

"No man really becomes a fool until he stops asking questions."
- Charles P. Steinmetz

"The people never give us their liberties but under some delusion."
- Edmund Burke - Speech at Meeting of Buckinghamshire, 1784

"The US Presidency is a Tudor monarchy plus telephones."
- Anthony Burgess, 1917-1993

"Basic research is what I'm doing when I don't know what I'm doing."
- Werner Von Braun, 1912-1977

"The surest way to make a monkey out of a man is to quote him."
- Robert Benchley, 1936

"Silentium, stultorum virtus - Silence is the virtue of fools."
- Francis Bacon, 1623

"A man of action forced into a state of thought is unhappy until he can get out of it."
- John Galsworthy, 1931

"Love is the wisdom of the fool and the folly of the wise."
- Samuel Johnson, 1709-1784

"The world is becoming like a lunatic asylum run by lunatics."
- David Lloyd George, 1933

"Et c'est une folie a nulle autre seconde,
De vouloir se meler de corriger le monde.
Of all human follies there's none could be greater
Than trying to render our fellow-men better."
- Moliere, 1666

"Good taste and humour ... are a contradiction in terms, like a chaste whore."
- Malcom Muggeridge, 1953

"There is only one step from the sublime to the ridiculous."
- Napoleon I, 1812

"Do you think my mind is maturing late,
Or simply rotted early?"
- Ogden Nash, 1942

"It looks like a poached egg - we can't make that."
- Lord Nuffield British motor manufacturer, on seeing the Morris Minor prototype in 1945

"The grim fact is that we prepare for war like precocious giants and for peace like retarded pygmies."
- Lester Pearson, 1955

"Optimumque est, ut volgo dixere, aliena insania frui.
And the best plan is, as the popular saying was, to profit by the folly of others."
- Pliny the Elder, AD 23-79

"We live and learn, but not the wiser grow."
- John Pomfret - 'Reason' 1700

"A brain of feathers, and a heart of lead."
- Alexander Pope The Dunciad, 1742

"You beat your pate, and fancy wit will come:
Knock as you please, there's nobody at home."
- Alexander Pope, 1732

"To endeavour to work upon the vulgar with fine sense, is like attempting to hew blocks with a razor."
- Alexander Pope, 1727

"Real education must ultimately be limited to one who INSISTS on knowing, the rest is mere sheep-herding."
- Ezra Pound, 1934

"Ce qui n'est pas clair n'est pas francais.
What is not clear is not French."
- Antoine de Rivarol, 1784

"Income Tax has made more Liars out of the American people than Golf."
- Will Rogers, 1924

"Everything is funny as long as it is happening to Somebody Else."
- Will Rogers, 1924

"The follies which a man regrets most, in his life, are those which he didn't commit when he had the opportunity."
- Helen Rowland, 1922

"Men who are unhappy, like men who sleep badly, are always proud of the fact."
- Bertrand Russell, 1930

"Grown-ups never understand anything for themselves, and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever explaining things to them."
- Antoine de Saint-Exupery, 1943

"To err is human but to really foul things up requires a computer."
- Farmers' Almanac for 1978

"If they [the Republicans] will stop telling lies about the Democrats, we will stop telling the truth about them."
- Adlai Stevenson, 1952

"Eternity's a terrible thought. I mean, where's it all going to end?"
- Tom Stoppard, 1967

"Hated by fools, and fools to hate,
Be that my motto and my fate."
- Jonathan Swift, 1718

"The stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naive forgive and forget; the wise forgive but do not forget."
- Thomas Szasz, 1973

"Early to rise and early to bed makes a male healthy and wealthy and dead."
- James Thurber, 1939

"Plus on apprend a connaitre l'homme, plus on apprend a estimer le chien.
The more one gets to know of men, the more one values dogs."
- A. Toussenel - L'Esprit des Betes 1847

"Hain't we got all the fools in town on our side? and ain't that a big enough majority in any town?"
- Mark Twain - The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn 1884

"All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence; then success is sure."
- Mark Twain, 1887

"A healthy male adult bore consumes each year one and a half times his own weight in other people's patience."
- John Updike, 1965

"A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold."
- Ogden Nash, 1902-1971
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