Thursday's Child ... has far to go ... (0nm10wn2feet) wrote,
Thursday's Child ... has far to go ...

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And so THIS is Christmas???

I'll pass.  Thanks.  The best thing I can say about Christmas Day is that my luck is holding... the BAD luck, that is.  The truck broke down on the way to my mother's in Kazoo.  On the freeway.  At the exit to - get this - CLIMAX, Michigan.  It happens to be in the middle of the no-man's-land between Battle Creek and Kalamazoo.  I wanted to cry.  And scream.  And stomp my feet.  Just for the hell of it, of course.

I was really hoping, after I got back from the northwoods after Thanksgiving, that things would settle down if I just kept my head down and stayed very, very quiet.  BWAHAHAHAHA!  Stupid idea, that!!  Definitely one of my more idiotic fantasies, that's for sure.

Two days after we got back, I had to go to a mediation hearing with my friend about her son.  That worked out quite well, but I didn't get a chance to really enjoy that minor victory.  My friend had a nasty case of "kid cooties" and successfully passed them along to me.  Yippie Skippy!!  Kid viruses and middle-aged people do NOT get along well, let me tell you.  Not at all.

I was sicker than a dog by Friday of that same week.  By Monday of the next week, it had developed into a sinus and ear infection.  The very next day was my appt with the oral surgeon to have him view the broken tooth (which, if you recall, happened at the culmination of the day I lost the brakes on my daughter's truck, got stuck in my own driveway, and had a sofa leap out at me on the freeway).  I thought the appt was merely a consultation.  No such luck!

Despite how utterly miserable I already was from the infections and virus, I had the dubious honor of having my jaw wrenched six ways from Sunday, a bone graft done (yum, cadaver bone... good stuff!), and stitches in my mouth that very same day!!!  How freakin' lucky can one person get?  Just wait, I'll tell you!!!!!!!  Owing to her ongoing predilection for drinking out of my diet Coke bottle, my daughter came down with the kid crud the very next week.  Owing to HIS predilection for sharing his smoking materials with his sister, my son got it right after her.  Last week, it was hubby's turn.  EVERYBODY groused about it in a MAJOR fashion, and I still haven't completely recovered.

Perhaps, after reading yesterday's horoscope (more like HORRORSCOPE), I probably should have stayed home.  Or, at the very least, I should have taken the car instead of my truck.  Or... SOMETHING.  I mean, c'mon.  Read this and tell me if YOU would have gone on a 2 1/2 hour road trip!!

The horoscope I got for Christmas Day

See what I mean?  Anyway, stupid me thought the "things going awry" was me getting up late, hence making everyone late getting out the door... but nooooooo.  Nothing that simple, I'm afraid.  Or inexpensive, more's the pity.  I realize, more so than many, I think, that life is not supposed to be smooth sailing.  Still, I can't help but feel like the butt of some cosmic or karmic joke lately, y'know?  Srsly.

Anyway, the truck started feeling kinda funny in Lansing.  It didn't get noticeably worse until we got on I-94 toward Kazoo, just outside of Battle Creek.  Suddenly, it sounded like things were falling off and the steering felt like we had a flat tire.  I got off the freeway as quickly as possible (since I was doing my usual 80 mph in the left lane at the time), and the boys jumped out to assess the damage.  It was considerable.  Evidently, one of the control arms disintegrated, damaging the shock absorber, shredding my 2 month-old, $250/ea tire, and chewing through the brake line.  We limped the truck off the ramp and into a convenient "Park & Ride" lot.

I proceeded to call my mother and let her know that we had a slight problem.  Havoc ensued when my sister & brother-in-law started talking to mom, telling her things to tell me; while my crew (all three of them) were arguing about what I should ask mom to do.  We finally agreed that my sister & her hubby would come get us and use their AAA to find a wrecker.  Fortunately, while we were sitting at the "Park & Ride," a "county mountie" was also sitting there, although we had no clue why.  HE called a wrecker that happened to take AAA, so we were home free there.  None of us, having all moved out of the area MANY years ago, knew of any auto repair places in the vicinity, though.  I'm still crossing my fingers that we don't get screwed to the wall for the repairs.

Actually, since there isn't much in the truck that identifies who owns it, I'm crossing my fingers that it actually ended up where the wrecker driver said he was taking it.  AND that we don't get screwed on the repairs.  A funny side-note, though... it turns out that the gas station across the street from the "Park & Ride" was the scene of a drug bust while we were sitting there watching the cop cars come and go... about 5 of them in all.  The strange thing is that I was IN that gas station while someone was on the phone - evidently calling the cops - and didn't notice a damn thing.  Freaky stuff.  Just freaky.

After we got to my mom's place, I called the rental car place at the airport in Kazoo... for some odd reason, those poor people were open until 9:00 pm on Christmas Day.  That must've sucked hard, cuz that airport was crammed at 6:00 pm when I was there.  We ended up renting a cute little Nissan Altima for the trip home.  Which has to be back on... NEW YEAR'S DAY... and no sooner!!  I'm so enjoying my life right now - I even got dumb enough to rent a friggin' car that I CAN'T SMOKE IN WHILE I'M DRIVING IT.  It's plastered with no smoking decals on the dash.  WTF???  The only places I smoke are in my garage (even in the middle of arctic weather) or while I'm driving.  Period.  And I haven't figured out how, in all the years I've been smoking, to maintain my composure throughout a stressful drive without one.

With MY family in the car, you can bet the drive was stressful, to say the very least.  My husband continually clutched the convenient panic strap above the window on his side of the car while bitching non-stop about my driving (I've only had my license 4 years longer than he has, y'know? But I couldn't possibly know how to drive safely, could I?).  My children almost came to blows in the back seat over:  singing along with the radio, redistributing the 'cargo' that was on the seat between them, and exactly whose fault it was because the take home container with the leftover potatoes opened all over Steven.  Among other things, of course.  Whee, huh?

The only semi-bright spot in the entire week has been Steven's results on his GED testing.  Steven is one of those kids that just didn't handle the 'pound the square peg into the round hole' philosophy of public school very well.  Still, he isn't too terribly lazy, nor is he stupid by any stretch of the imagination.  It was a pleasant surprise to him that, not only did he pass all portions of the testing, but he passed all portions HANDILY.  In some cases, like reading, social studies & science, he EXCEEDED the knowledge level of over 80% of all high school students who graduate with regular diplomas.  I was VERY happy for my sweet boy (yeah, some "boy!" He has more hair on his face and body than his father, stands about as tall, and can be a VERY imposing figure when he wishes)!!

At any rate, there you have the latest installment of the "Perils of ME."  I am so damn tired of all this CARP that I could cheerfully have a nervous breakdown right now.  But can't, of course, since I am the 'voice of reason' and soul of patience in this family.  Not only that, but no one would EVER get their cars FIXED if they didn't have me to do all the running, y'know?  Blah. I could live a long time without some of this fun. It's past my bedtime... G'night world and, wherever you are, I hope your holidays were more fun than mine!!!!!!

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